Wavering, Wavering

I fell asleep in my house that night, in my cold room, lost within my feelings, lost within my mind, lost amongst the dunes of my sheets, I fell asleep in their shadow, looking for an answer to a smile, looking for that unique feeling of smiling without reason, wanting for reason, to get lost in a field, to get lost, and to let the heart exist alone.

I woke up in a field of green grass, of which I ate a piece, enjoying its flavor of calm, from the yellow flowers, I ate a piece, tasting smiles; the red sun of the dawn forbids me of seeing clearly, but, I walk towards another way, with my blue heart; I wander by my field, my field of calm, in which I awoke, blinded by the red sun, fed by the yellow of the flowers, feeling a green calm inside my blue heart.

The awakened sky is clear as I have ever seen it, and I walk below its immensity without problems, enjoying this moment in this beautiful place, but the sky doesn’t wonder how I feel, where do I come from, I’m just looking for someone that has been alone, that like, walks in a field, I want to meet you.

I found a wardrobe in the middle of this landscape of green and blue, a wardrobe made of brilliant wood, when I opened it I understood, that I’m at my place, I’m not lonely anymore, and now, what does a not lonely person wears? What will I sing now?

I doubt, I doubt, wavering, wavering, I hear in the wind, feelings flying, flowers smelling, my heart sings again, my chest beats again, I breath at last, waver, where do I have to go, I get lost, I disguise myself in sky, I disguise myself as a calf in the grass, I dress in love, I feel myself in the wind, I feel myself in the water, I feel myself in the wind, I feel the heat of this brilliant sun warming my cold soul and bathe it in light of hope, I feel accompanied, I feel in a way that I had forgotten.

Being prepared is the lie written by a thousand pencils on floating sheets of paper in the wind, that cross this green field, even though, in that, there is a fragment of truth, a fragment of bitter knowledge, a fragment that feed my heart in color.

I walk towards the horizon and I see a silhouette, of long black hair, of faceless beauty, of beauty, whose face I don’t need to know, of beauty, that is felt closer in the horizon, I walk towards her and I know that by dusk, I will be near, I get closer and closer, wavering, wavering, I feel butterflies inside me and bluebirds in my mind, I don’t know what will happen, but I know what to say; when I get near her, she turns to me, she looks me like she’s been in love with me since always, and that she has been waiting here alone for my arrival, when I try to speak, she silences me, and whispers, in the immensity of this field, in the green of this day, in the calm of the grass, in the smiles of the flowers, in the red sun that starts to hide, she clears the blue from my heart, like she knows exactly what I want, that’s what she’s going to say, my tormented thought calms down, she silences me, she says: “Let’s look for a peaceful always”

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